Today

Sharpie Ghost writing under gesso, acrylic with Stencil and collage.
 

 

 

Today was an absolute craptastic day.  It was a day of yelling, a day of crying, a day of awkward silences.  It was the kind of day that nothing goes right and no matter how hard you try to turn it around, it's destined for failure.  Today, I was a horrible mother, I lost control, had a melt down, and scared my kids.  Yes it was a spectacular fail.  The atmosphere has been weird all weekend.  Little Krazy and Mr. Krazy have been butting heads constantly in a continuous power struggle.  I feel for Little Krazy, to feel powerless, to have someone assert themselves into your space when you just want to be left alone.   So much frustration and anger, and the only way to release it is in yells and tears.  To be told to stop it, or be quiet already.  How the mood of one person can affect so many.  I feel for Mr. Krazy, to constantly be told by your son to go away, I don't like you, I don't wanna hear you, you're stinky.  I feel for my middle Krazy, trying so hard to play the peace keeper, to stay out of the way, to be heard, to be happy.  I feel so deeply the pain that this family is in.  The unfairness of our emotional upheaval, and seemingly ineffectual ways of dealing with our problems.  I wonder if we will improve, if therapy will be our life preserver or if we will merely pull each other under.  Today was a bad day.  I'm gonna leave it here, where it will become the past.  I hope that tomorrow dawns brighter. 

Stay Safe, and Love Yourself,